7 Differences Between Constructive And Destructive Criticism
All people at different times in our lives face comments or criticism from third parties. Receiving opinions from other people is a fundamental aspect of life in society and human communication; We cannot change or modify the way other people think about us, but we can learn to deal with this criticism in an appropriate way so that it does not endanger our self-esteem.
Normally, the distinction is made between constructive criticism and constructive criticism to the extent that the former have an intention to improve and promote motivation to improve, while the latter only have the objective of hurting and destroying those behaviors, attitudes or products that are being criticized. It is important to establish healthy boundaries with the people we interact with to promote constructive criticism over destructive criticism.
In this article we are going to comment 7 differences between constructive and destructive criticism highlighting the importance of receiving, accepting or refuting constructive criticism, and delimiting the destructive criticism that we may face to prevent it from having a significantly harmful impact.
A critique has been defined as an analysis or judgment about a situation, a person or a job. In general, criticism refers to judgments that can be objective or subjective. In objective criticism, an evaluation is issued with objective criteria on a specific report, task or topic, while in subjective criticism, opinions are expressed that convey a specific point of view. Many times, it can be very difficult to digest criticism, whether due to having a high need for approval, having many insecurities, or believing that everything other people tell you is real and true. It is important to learn to adjust criticism and try to make a role change in relation to our attitude or behavior. You must also show empathy for the opinions of others and value the behavior of family or friends towards you
But what happens when the purpose of criticism is exclusively to hurt or harm? This is what destructive criticism refers to, they only seek to cause harm, whether due to the insecurities of the person criticizing, envy, or issues related to personality. In these cases, the most important thing is to keep in mind that the harmful opinions that other people have about you is their problem, not yours. We will never be able to control what others think, but you will be able to control the way these types of comments affect you.
It is very important to define healthy boundaries with the people around us to try to ensure that, instead of destructive criticism, constructive criticism prevails, and that sharing opinions is an opportunity to grow and learn for everyone. This is what we talk about when we mention constructive criticism; comments or observations that They help us realize mistakes or ways to improve something without being designed to harm us but issued with the objective of taking into account the opinion of someone who may be important to us or to the behavior or action that is the object of criticism.
Differences between constructive criticism and destructive criticism
Having delimited the general conception of constructive and destructive criticism, it is time to list differential elements that make this type of criticism easier to distinguish and elaborate within ourselves. Below, we propose a list of significant differences between constructive and destructive criticism, to make it easier to identify them and define the impact they have on our well-being and self-esteem.
1. Intention
As previously mentioned, constructive criticism is issued with the main intention of improving, of taking into consideration the opinion of an important person for us or in the field of what is criticized. On the contrary, Destructive criticism is issued with the main objective of destroying or damaging the self-esteem of the people being criticized They start from envy, insecurities or personal problems that are projected when these comments or observations are revealed. They do not provide any alternative or another way of seeing things, they only demotivate or discourage the person criticized.
2. Focus on the problem
In relation to the above, constructive criticism focuses on identifying what problems there may be in what was criticized, providing specific areas of improvement and solutions or suggestions to resolve these possible errors. However, Destructive criticism focuses on highlighting errors and defects and does not offer alternatives or ideas to solve them As mentioned in intentionality, its objective is to harm and to make the person criticized stop doing what was criticized; They do not seek to improve this aptitude or behavior, but rather to abandon it completely.
Normally, constructive criticism is conveyed in a respectful and considerate manner in the speech, using a friendly and empathetic tone of voice. On the contrary, destructive criticism tends to be primarily derogatory, aggressive, sarcastic or passive-aggressive, generating animosity and resentment. This form of communication negatively impacts self-esteem and the trust we place in other people, in addition to influencing us when it comes to accepting other criticism or comments from third parties.
4. Orientation towards the person or the act
Constructive criticism is focused on the act or behavior targeted by criticism, seeking improvements or different ways of acting, avoiding attacking or judging the person as a whole. Destructive criticism, on the other hand, is directed subjectively at the person making negative comments about their worth or personal abilities and generating the feeling that this simple behavior or action represents the person as a whole.
5. Focus on growth
As mentioned above, constructive criticism will always seek to build, focusing on the growth of the person criticized and their personal, emotional or professional development, to give examples. It seeks to help the person or project improve to reach its maximum potential. However, destructive criticism seeks to undermine confidence and discourage progress or motivation.
6. Presentation of alternatives
Constructive criticism usually includes specific suggestions or alternatives to the criticized behavior, helping to resolve the identified problems However, destructive criticism tends to simply highlight negative aspects without offering practical ideas or solutions. Normally, the person who issues destructive criticism has no interest in the person being criticized changing what has been criticized; She wants him to continue doing it “badly,” whether for her personal satisfaction, his envy, or a whole set of psychological-emotional variables that represent this person’s insecurity.
7. Reception and affection
In general, constructive criticism is better received, as it is perceived as an opportunity to learn and improve. It can strengthen relationships and generate an environment of trust and growth. Typically, giving constructive criticism strengthens bonds between people, fosters trust, and makes it easier and more possible to trust the other person in the future and with new criticism. Instead, Destructive criticism often has a negative impact, damaging relationships and demotivating people, resulting in stagnation or decline in performance. These are very complex for establishing a relationship, because in many cases, a person who constantly emits this type of criticism can be so harmful that he or she becomes a toxic person for us, it is difficult to get out of this relationship.
In conclusion, as has been mentioned since the beginning of this article, criticism will always be present in our social life and establishment of relationships with other people. Therefore, it is important to adjust and adapt to them, to prepare a role change that accepts and feeds back criticism instead of systematically rejecting it. It is logical to think that it is not always easy to accept criticism, especially when it is not issued in a constructive way, but in a destructive way. From here, we recommend establishing healthy limits with the people around us to maximize the establishment of constructive criticism and modify destructive criticism. The only efficient way to do this is through open and assertive communication.
Although it may be complicated, it is important to be empathetic and compassionate with a person who only emits destructive criticism; You may be going through bad times or have problems with jealousy or insecurities. Therefore, you must communicate in a positive way the impact that this type of criticism may be having on you, establishing the limit that, if you do not seek criticism that can improve what was criticized, you prefer not to receive it. Remember to rely on constructive opinions and try to prevent destructive ones from causing the rejection of positive comments. It is important to think that one way to reduce the destructive criticism we receive is by issuing constructive criticism; We can also motivate other people to improve.
