In our current social reality, the need for approval has become an omnipresent aspect of our lives. From childhood, we are taught to seek the approval of others as a form of validation and acceptance, and this has increasingly repercussions on our behavior in relation to our personal relationships. Referring to the current influence of social networks, it is vital to realize that they work to a large extent due to the need for social approval.
The need for approval refers to the emotional dependence on the opinions of others to feel worth and secure We seek this validation and social acceptance in our actions, choices, and achievements, fearing rejection or disapproval from others. This need can arise from multiple factors, such as social pressure, lack of self-confidence, and cultural standards.
Throughout this article, we will examine the dangers associated with excessive approval seeking, explore what causes the development of this attitude may have, and discuss and propose different strategies to overcome this need and foster a sense of self-acceptance and inner confidence. . By reflecting on the possibility of eliminating the need for approval, we enter a path towards personal empowerment and emotional liberation.
To better understand the consequences of the need for approval, it is important to consider what it entails and how it manifests in our lives. The need for approval is defined as a constant search for external validation, where We depend on the opinion and approval of others to feel valuable and secure
This need normally arises from different psychological and social causes. From an early age, we are exposed to learning that recognition and applause from others are part of indicators of success and personal worth. Our society values ​​conformity and rewards adaptation to established standards. As a result, we end up internalizing the belief that we need the approval of others to feel acceptance and love from others.
The need for approval manifests itself in different aspects of our lives, such as interpersonal relationships, the workplace, and the use of social networks. In relationships, we can feel like they trap us in a cycle of pleasing others to avoid rejection or disapproval. At work, for example, we may feel the need to obtain constant recognition and meet external expectations to feel with professional value. In a different context, on social networks, the exhaustive search for more likes and positive comments can become an obsession that affects our self-esteem and emotional well-being.
Relying on external approval can have negative effects on our mental and emotional health. When we are constantly worried about what others think of us, we can experience anxiety, low self-esteem and insecurity. This need can also limit our ability to make decisions based on our authentic values ​​and desires, as we focus on pleasing others rather than following our own internal compass.
It is important to be aware that the need for approval It is a socially learned pattern, so we can work to free ourselves from its influence By becoming aware of our own needs and values, we can begin to build a solid foundation of our self-esteem and inner confidence. As we accept ourselves, the need for external approval begins to lose its power among us.
The dangers of excessive approval seeking
Moving on, it is important to be aware of the negative implications of excessive approval seeking. Recognizing the dangers associated with excessive approval seeking is the first step in freeing ourselves from its influence. As we have mentioned, this can negatively affect different aspects of our lives, such as:
1. Limitation of authenticity
When we constantly seek approval from another person, we tend to adapt and conform to what we think others want or expect from us. This It distances us from our own authenticity and prevents us from expressing our true essence and opinions We become distorted versions of ourselves, which can lead to dissatisfaction and a lack of meaning in our lives.
2. Inhibition of personal growth
The need for approval can hinder our personal growth. If we avoid taking risks or exploring new opportunities for fear of rejection or disapproval from others, we stagnate in our comfort zone. Personal growth and development requires a willingness to face challenges and follow our own path, even if that means facing criticism or disapproval.
Emotional dependence on external approval makes us fragile and vulnerable beings. Our self-esteem and sense of worth become totally dependent on the opinions of others. If we do not receive the approval we seek, we experience negative emotions such as sadness, anxiety, and personal devaluation. This puts us in a position of emotional weakness, leaving our well-being in the hands of others
4. Difficulty setting limits
Those who constantly seek approval may have difficulty setting healthy boundaries in their relationships. They may be afraid to say “no” or express their own needs and desires, as they fear rejection or disapproval from others. This can lead to a lack of balance in relationships and a tendency to please others to the detriment of your own health and well-being.
5. Impact on self-esteem
The need for constant approval can have a negative impact on our self-esteem. If our self-worth depends completely on the opinions of others, our self-esteem becomes fragile and susceptible to fluctuations. Additionally, when we do not receive the approval we seek, we can experience feelings of inadequacy and rejection which further erodes our self-esteem.
Overcome the need for approval
Although the need for approval can be deep-rooted and difficult to overcome, there are strategies and tips that can help us free ourselves from its influence. Below, we’ll explore some ways to overcome the need for approval and foster greater self-confidence:
1. Cultivate self-acceptance
Learning to accept ourselves unconditionally, with our virtues and defects, is essential to overcome the need for approval. Recognizing and valuing our own qualities and learning to forgive ourselves for our mistakes allows us to build a solid foundation of internal self-esteem. It is important learn that we are valuable people regardless of other people’s opinions
2. Connect with our personal values ​​and goals
Defining our own values ​​and goals helps us make decisions based on what is important to us, rather than seeking the approval of others. Aligning our actions with our values ​​gives us a sense of purpose and authenticity, strengthening our self-confidence. When we establish values ​​based on the influence of other people, we are not being consistent with our own personality and way of seeing things; We do not discover ourselves.
Taking care of our physical, emotional and mental health is essential to strengthen our self-esteem and reduce dependence on external approval. This includes set healthy boundaries learn to say “no” when necessary and dedicate time to activities that nourish us and make us feel good.
4. Challenge limiting beliefs
Questioning the negative beliefs that fuel our need for approval is an important step in overcoming it. Recognizing that our worth does not depend on the opinions of others and challenging self-critical thoughts allows us to change our perspective and build a more positive and empowered mindset.
5. Practice assertiveness
Developing assertive skills helps us communicate our needs and desires clearly and respectfully. Assertiveness allows us to set healthy boundaries and express our opinions without fear of disapproval. As we practice assertiveness, we gain confidence in our abilities to deal with difficult situations and become less dependent on external approval.
6. Seek positive social support
Surrounding ourselves with people who support us and accept us as we are can be a great help in overcoming the need for approval. Look for relationships based on authenticity and mutual respect provides us with a supportive environment where we can grow and develop without the constant fear of disapproval.
Remember that overcoming the need for approval is a gradual and personal process. It requires self-reflection, patience and constant practice. Over time, we can build strong internal confidence and greater emotional autonomy, freeing ourselves from the influence of external approval and living a more authentic and fulfilling life.
The importance of being yourself
When we move away from other people’s acceptance and approval, we embrace personal individuality. Each person is unique and that is what gives us value ; We must learn to know how to guide ourselves and know that that is enough. You are enough the way you are, and seeking other people to appreciate you will only make you constantly dependent on other people’s opinions, forgetting that the opinion that truly matters when we talk about yourself is your own.
