In just a few years, the mobile phone has gained great importance in our way of communicating, informing ourselves, having fun and also… flirting and/or falling in love.
We live in a hurried society, the lack of time has changed the way we relate. Of course “the old customs” are never lost, but lately there is an increasing tendency to look for a partner online. Applications of very diverse kinds proliferate, with the same purpose. Surely, as I write this article we already have some more at our disposal.
Tinder, Adopt a guy, Meetic, Edarling, Badoo, Pof, Lovoo, Uniq, Shakn, Happn… They all have a common denominator: they are a sample of profiles with which we can chat first and then meet in person if we feel like it. In themselves, they are still a tool that will work depending on the expectations that each of us has and the use that we want to give it. However, it is true that there are classifications of these depending on what you are looking for: some have a reputation for being more serious, others for being a “jungle.”
The image that we generate of the other as a result of our conversations will depend on the one hand on our needs and on the other on what our interlocutor wants to project. Chats that last forever are more likely to create high expectations, whatever our intention: a sexual relationship, a stable partner, a friendship… Like any communication channel, it is at the expense of sincerity and the ease of being able to share with the other. What is our intention? One of the first questions that is most often asked is: “what are you looking for here?” It is important to answer this question honestly to ourselves. This will prevent us from wasting time, and even from being disappointed.
The ease of relationship generated by the mobile or computer screen means that many people who feel alone take refuge in anonymity to be able to open up to the other or others. Because let’s not forget that many people are carrying out conversations with several users at the same time. This type of profile is hooked on having that moment in which to talk to someone, even going so far as to have cybersex. Many of these people may not be able to meet anyone, they simply escape their loneliness through this means. By loneliness we do not only mean physical, but also emotional. There are many people who use these types of pages because their relationship is not satisfactory, they feel that their youth is running out or they want to “feel alive again.”
We found collector profiles of lovers who love the game of seduction and “The hunt” itself. And, although we may think that it is a more masculine behavior, it also occurs in women. It is usually seen especially in processes such as a recent separation (in which the level of promiscuity increases), the well-known “middle age crisis” either “the second adolescence”.
In summary, applications are not “good or bad” for finding a partner, it will simply depend on how we use them and, of course, the person with whom we interact.
Here are some tips when using these applications:1. Do not put relevant personal information in our profile (address, telephone number, surname…)2. Take care of the photos we choose to complete it. Many people use photos with minors (usually their children) or with friends. Better to keep the image of our children private. If you want, you can specify that you are a mother or father in your profile. It is important to include current photos, otherwise we are deceiving our interlocutor and we have a great chance of our date failing.3. Being assertive does not cost that much: on many occasions, when we lose interest in the conversation or the interlocutor, we are not able to say it.4. Be careful with the material that we can send online, WhatsApp, etc. The proximity that is established with the other can make us forget that we don’t really know that person. The photos and videos we send may end up posted on the Internet for everyone to see.5. If we are having several conversations at the same time, it is likely that our interlocutor is too. So getting angry about “watching it online” doesn’t make much sense.6. Beware of fake profiles: there are many people who just like to chat, others who like to laugh at others…7. Get ready to test your ego: you are going to find rejections, sit-outs, disappointments. You must remember that another person’s opinion of you does not define you. It’s just your opinion.
