Why do my partner and I no longer see each other with the same eyes as we did at the beginning of our relationship?
During the socialization process and throughout our lives we meet many people with whom we could live as a couple, but we select the one that has the most qualities or best characteristics to create a life project.
At first passion and infatuation They make us trust and we think that yes, they are the ideal person. We make plans, and finally we make the decision to share our life with him/her. At the beginning of this coexistence everything seems to be going well, because love and commitment then other feelings come into play like the trust also, and this is when those things that passion and infatuation did not let us see begin to show their face; defects
We all have defects, but during the first phase we try to hide them or simply because the time we spend together is shorter, there is no time for them to come to light. and it is during the coexistence phase where they begin to appear.
The day to day life, the responsibilities, the problems that arise and the new technologies together with that trust make the couple stop doing those things that they initially did (create new memories, have interesting conversations, tell what bothers us, etc.) and little by little each member of the couple becomes isolated. Years go by and it seems that that ideal has faded, we no longer talk; We argue, he no longer tells me nice things; It’s just that you don’t even notice, we no longer share moments, only spaces in which each one is more aware of their tablet and mobile phone than of what at the beginning was the most important thing: the couple I chose. And little by little we are becoming closer. unknown to each other, and we decided to throw in the towel and separate.
We do not realize that perhaps we are rushing, we do not realize how much we have invested. And most importantly, what we have left to invest.
In a situation like this, the most advisable thing is to ask for help, perhaps the most comfortable thing is to ask a friend or family member, but we have to keep in mind that any of them, with their good will, will listen to us and will try to understand us, but they cannot be objectives, since they do not even live with us and they also have biased information, they would need to hear the opposite version.
For this reason, asking a professional for help is the most recommended way. Why?
Because a good professional will listen to both parties, will evaluate the situation objectively, will help us redirect the situation, to assess what is truly important. He will send us simple exercises in order to restore confidence in oneself. itself and in our partner, it will teach us that things are not black or white, that there are an infinite number of colors that we can take advantage of, ultimately it will teach us to return to that ideal beginning, where there were only “eyes for you.”
