How do you know if you are starting a relationship well? Discover the tips that will help you start relationships in a satisfactory way.
Having a relationship helps to improve our mood and our self-esteem Perhaps it is for that reason and because humans are sociable beings that we tend to look for someone, an accomplice with whom to share life. But we don’t always do it in the best way or at the right time. Therefore, today I am going to talk about the best way to start a relationship:
Do I really want to have a relationship?: Sometimes we get carried away by the dynamics and we don’t stop to think if we want to start a relationship. If you are getting to know someone and you see that the relationship is deepening in terms of intimacy and commitment, it is important that you ask yourself that question. If the answer is yes, great! Let yourself go, but if on the other hand you don’t feel like committing even if the person is wonderful, you will unconsciously look for a way to boycott the relationship, so be honest with yourself and with the other person. person.
Am I ready to start a relationship?: It’s not all about knowing if you want, sometimes you may be wanting to have a relationship but it may not be the right time. If you just got out of a relationship and you still think about your ex, it is not the time to start a new relationship. That phrase “one nail pulls out another nail” is almost never true. The heart is often a house that only admits one guest and if it is occupied no one else can enter. You must first grieve before starting a relationship with another person.
What do I want my relationship to have?: Sometimes we meet someone and we let ourselves be carried away by the magic of falling in love in such a way that we do not establish the foundations of the relationship. Although there are things you don’t like, you keep quiet about them because you are in love and you hope they will disappear on their own. But this is not always the case, in fact, it is almost never the case. Therefore, if you want the relationship to work, it is important to work on laying those foundations and talking about what you don’t like or need to change.
And in addition to this, we must also take into account other factors:
Communication is essential: There are all kinds of people, there are more or less communicative but it is essential to have some minimums. We cannot constantly play at being fortune tellers and that game is like playing with fire, in the end we get burned. Talking about anything but above all, talking about feelings is essential for a relationship to last.
Avoid talking about previous relationships: It is one thing for them to know what your life has been like and quite another for your partner to know in detail what your past relationships have been like. There are many topics to talk about, and explaining things about other relationships encourages comparison and often arguments. So stay healthy.
Accept the person in front of you: Don’t want to make a custom suit and avoid impossible expectations. A relationship is like if you buy a dress in your size but then you add a belt and roll up the sleeves; You have to adapt it to your taste but not change it completely. Therefore, accept their virtues and defects. You can ask him to change some things that you don’t like, but only what is strictly essential for you. In the rest, you have to accept that you will not be able to have a perfect relationship (don’t look for it, it doesn’t exist), therefore, see if your expectations are realistic or impossible.
The physique does matter: It is not necessary to be with a supermodel but it is important that you feel a certain physical and sexual attraction, especially at the beginning of the relationship. Otherwise what you will have is a good friendship relationship. If from the beginning you don’t feel attracted, don’t force yourself, what you will do is get attached to the person but you won’t achieve that attraction.
Try not to let the relationship be the only thing that gives you identity: If what you are looking for is a partner who will cover your other needs, perhaps you will be able to make the relationship last, but you will become emotionally dependent, and that is not a good start to a relationship either. If you lack friends, look for friends, not a boyfriend, if you lack hobbies, think about what you would like to do, if you lack motivation, think about goals that you can achieve. A partner takes away your time for all that and perhaps that is what you are looking for, but you will be tied to someone for not focusing on what you really need.
You have to be flexible and reach agreements: One thing is the idea you have of what you want your relationship to be like, and another very different thing is not allowing the slightest difference. For example, imagine that you start dating someone who really likes soccer and you hate it. It’s not about watching all the games they show on television, but maybe you have to understand that it’s their hobby and you have to respect it. Make a deal with that person and reach an agreement that makes you both feel comfortable.
You do not own anyone: There are people who think that they can prohibit their partner and determine what they can and cannot do. Make no mistake. As I said before, it is about reaching agreements, sometimes you will have to give in and other times the other person will have to give in, but you cannot force anyone (in the same way that you should not allow yourself to be forced into something) to do what you want. Relationships have to be based on equality and neither of them has to be above the other.
Respect the other person’s time: Maybe you are very clear that he is the person in your life and you want him to already meet your family and friends. But maybe the other person is not at the same point as you. So let that come when you are both ready to take the step. Don’t ask for what the other person cannot give you at that moment.
