Why shouldn’t you expect anything from anyone? Is it good advice according to psychology? Discover the reason behind phrases like ‘never expect anything from anyone’ and why you should listen to it.
You’ve probably heard phrases like ‘do not expect anything from anyone ‘ many times in your life. It is very possible that the people who give you this advice do not know the reasons why you should follow it. The main reason is that by expecting something from someone you are generating expectations that may not be met, something that can not only damage your relationship but also harm yourself.
Why is it better not to expect anything from anyone?
Most people have expectations, especially when it comes to our relationships. For example, fathers and mothers often expect their children to be one way; Couples expect their partner to be a certain way and even friends want us to act in some circumstances. These expectations, which make us expect something from someone specific, cause us to end up harming ourselves and those around us.
Expectations make people begin to believe that we should all think, feel, and act under a specific standard. These types of thoughts make people feel deeply disappointed both in ourselves and in others.
The main problem of expect something from someone is that behind this thought there is the belief that the people we love, upon knowing us, should act in a specific way. Something that can’t happen since no one is in our brains.
Don’t expect anything from anyone: Why is this good advice?
Making assumptions about the future just means betting that something can happen. In the same way as with games of chance, there is always the possibility that what we expected will never happen. Therefore, the ‘Never expect anything from anyone ‘ is good advice, since it means not being disappointed by things that perhaps we shouldn’t be frustrated about.
This involves taking responsibility for our attitudes towards others. That is to say, obviously we should not get rid of our expectations, but understand that there are things that are not understood and that must be explained to others.
Therefore, It is better not to expect anything from anyone and assume a less demanding and much more open attitude towards the actions of others. In this way, not only do we not get frustrated, but we are more open to communicating our desires and feelings to the people around us, a small gesture that will greatly improve your relationships.
How to stop expecting something from someone?
To put aside expectations, people must work and focus more on ourselves. That is, assuming our responsibility for the feelings or thoughts we experience. To do this, a professional psychologist can help you communicate better with those around you and be more effective when assuming these responsibilities. Additionally, you can follow the following tips.
- Leave perfectionism behind: Normally the people who usually expect something from someone They have a tendency toward perfectionism. In this way, they feel that the people around them should be just as perfectionist as their attitudes and behaviors. Perfectionism is a good virtue, but it is best to try not to take this type of skill to the extreme.
- Nobody is like you : Although it may seem really obvious, in most cases people tend to act as if others know what we are like or what they should do to make us happy. This is an attitude that not only harms us in our relationships, but also makes us feel bad about ourselves.
- You won’t always get something in return : We must do our actions not to receive a reward, but simply because it is written in our values. He ‘do not expect anything from anyone’ It also applies in these cases, since when doing something for others we should not expect to be rewarded.
- Take responsibility for your happiness : Sometimes expecting something from someone means leaving the responsibility for our happiness to those around us. Conditioning our happiness on others makes us become dependent on our relationships.
- Learn to be more resilient : If you have ever felt bad because you have expected something from someone, this is a good opportunity to reflect and learn from it. Were these expectations realistic? What can you learn from these situations? In this way, you can further develop your resilience and ensure that your attitude is not influenced by the actions of others.
Without expecting anything from anyone, do you live better?
Taking responsibility for our actions does not mean forever putting aside our expectations of others. He ‘Never expect anything from anyone ‘ should not be taken literally, but as a phrase that reminds us that we have the ability to control our emotions and thoughts. By doing so, we are taking charge of our attitude towards life, something that will not only make us happier but will also improve our relationships with others. Learning it is very difficult and therefore, a professional psychologist can always help you be a more resilient person and manage your emotions and thoughts.