You don’t know how it happened, but suddenly, your partner began to become your world. You began to distance yourself from your friends, your family, your hobbies, your dreams: your partner was the only thing that mattered. And, okay, of course it’s normal to want to spend time with the person you love! But what happens when that need becomes a dependency that distances you from yourself?
If you feel like your relationship has crossed the boundaries of what is healthy and you are looking to regain your independence, this article is for you.
If you have surprised yourself on many occasions thinking that you need your partner to take every step in your life and that you cannot live without them, you have probably begun to feel that you are more addicted to your girlfriend every day. But, at this point, it is super necessary that we talk about emotional dependence.
We often idealize love and we believe that a healthy relationship involves constantly being together and depending on each other. However, when this dependency becomes excessive and begins to affect your emotional well-being, it can become a problem.
Emotional dependence is a pattern of behavior in which one person excessively needs another person to feel good. It’s like an addiction, but instead of one substance, the person becomes addicted to the emotional connection with another. In many cases, important decisions that should be your own fall to the loved one, so the limits of individuality begin to blur.
If you are wondering if you are addicted to your partner, it is important that you know the signs of emotional dependence. Below we will mention some of the most common signs:
Keys to overcoming your partner’s addiction
Did you identify with the previous signs? Feeling a kind of addiction to your partner is a fairly common situation. However, for your own emotional well-being, it is not exactly the most ideal situation.
If you are looking to leave emotional dependence behind and build a more balanced relationship with yourself and others, It is important that you take action and focus on your personal growth.
Here we share some keys that can help you in this process of change, so that you can overcome your partner’s addiction. All of them can be promoted in a psychotherapy process, even if you do not have any psychopathology. In this sense, remember that at PsicologÃa Plus we are at your disposal if you need psychotherapeutic support.
With that said, let’s move on to the tips.
1. Develop new skills
Overcoming emotional dependence requires a commitment to yourself and a desire to grow. Through developing new skills, you will be able to strengthen your self-esteem, increase your independence, and build healthier relationships.
Dare to leave your comfort zone and explore new facets of your personality. This will allow you to discover hidden talents and expand your horizons. By experiencing novelty and challenge, you will strengthen your resilience and self-confidence.
2. Discover your independence
Face your fear of losing your partner by experiencing independence. Discover who you are outside of the relationship and value your own space and time. To do this, you can plan solitary activities that allow you to enjoy your own company. It can be anything from a simple walk in the park to a solo trip.
Also encourage yourself to explore new hobbies or return to those that you had left aside.. Not only will this allow you to discover new passions, but it will also provide you with a sense of accomplishment and personal satisfaction.
Create daily routines that allow you to take care of yourself. Dedicate time to physical exercise, healthy eating and rest.
3. Be more assertive
Prioritize your needs and express your opinions clearly and respectfully. Learn how to set healthy boundaries and communicate effectively in your relationship. When you need to express your feelings, discomforts or needs, share them from your “I”, from what you feel and expect, without blaming others.
To be more assertive, it is also key to practice non-violent communication to resolve conflicts constructively and learn to say “no” without feeling guilty or ashamed.
4. Connect with your emotions
Spend time connecting with your emotions and learn to recognize and manage them. Understanding your own emotional needs is necessary to satisfy them in a healthy way. If you feel like it, keep a personal journal where you can express your feelings and thoughts freely and honestly.
You can also practice mindfulness and meditation techniques to cultivate full attention and reduce stress. Looking for activities that allow you to express your emotions creatively, such as painting, music or writing can also be a wonderful option.
5. Cultivate your relationships outside of your relationship
It is important to cultivate relationships outside of your relationship, spend time with friends, explore new interests, and take care of yourself. Maintaining a balance between your personal life and your relationship is essential. Reconnect with your friends and family. Participate in activities that allow you to meet new friends, in case you need to expand your circle.
Learning to manage your emotions is key to improving your interpersonal relationships and building greater self-confidence. Emotional intelligence will help you navigate your relationships in a healthier way. Get interested in the topic, read books and articles on emotional intelligence, attend workshops or courses that help you develop this skill or seek psychological help.
Seeking support from a therapist can be beneficial in exploring past emotional patterns, identifying limiting beliefs, and finding strategies to meet your emotional needs in healthier ways. It can also help you develop tools and skills to overcome emotional dependency and build healthier relationships.
By implementing these changes in your life, you will be taking important steps toward overcoming emotional dependency and cultivating healthier, more balanced relationships. Bet on you!
