Many times, the world insists that the partner we have be our better half and that this other half “ours” will give meaning to our lives. Big mistake!
For that we have all the Turkish soap operas that will make us cry and suffer the love and heartbreak of their adventures and misadventures. Let us not transform our lives into that regret, expecting that love to be a savior or a misfortune if it does not succeed.
Here is a secret that has become a verb for me. We are responsible, yes, responsible, for a single adult, which is our own person. And I say adult because, if we choose to have dependent children, that has been our adult choice.
Therefore, as adults we must build ourselves thinking about who we are and what we want to do with our life, the one we have today and is in our hands, giving meaning to it. Honoring her.
It is something we must do to be oriented towards a goal that will give meaning to our actions and our healthy living But that meaning cannot be given by anyone other than us. When the other person is the one who gives meaning to my life, sooner or later they will stop having it and I will wish they were far away.
The encounter with the other will be if (and only if) my life has meaning. If not, I will have nothing to share or plan with the other in a healthy way, and I will demand a toxic relationship from the other, a reflection of my toxicity.
Today we know that as people we are faced with a dizzying life with strong demands and changes, which mean that the plans we make today do not always define the person we will be tomorrow That is why it is essential to know ourselves, to know what our strengths and weaknesses are and to be able to visualize where we want to go. Give meaning to our lives for ourselves. Only then will we feel that we are on the right path. We can always change the shades, but the color palette will be ours.
Managing couple relationships
For a couple to function as a team, several considerations must be taken.
Starting and ending the day together is very important It does not imply being physically in the same place, but it does mean greeting each other every morning and going to sleep without being in a dispute, making peace beforehand if so. Being able to talk if a disagreement has arisen is essential and forgive yourself if there was something that hurt the other person, seeking to repair it.
Hug when you see each other, dedicating a few minutes to that reunion is very important. Manifesting the love we feel and making the other person feel loved is crucial. Having small gestures that make the other feel that we had them present in our day, making an effort to please the other and showing admiration for them are gestures that sometimes in the whirlwind of everyday life we do not take into account and they make our partner feel loved and at ease.
Let us remember that it is equally essential to feel loved and that our partner feels our love and that goes beyond telling them Dedicating time to microadventures, living experiences together, celebrating, laughing, is what unites us most.
Healthy mood management It means that no matter how many difficulties we face, we find in each other that refuge and the ability to laugh at ourselves and the situations we experience, finding that magic that connects us with the positive.
Let us love with all our soul, but first ourselves, and we will find the way to love others healthily.
