The human being lives in a constant balance of moments of solitude and moments of company. Although habitual loneliness is viewed with a negative connotation by many people, on the contrary, there are also many people who enjoy their solitary moments so much that they prioritize those plans over the alternative of social skills. In the process of maturity, the conquest of loneliness is the result of unconditional love for oneself. But… “Why do I always want to be alone? “. If you feel identified with this question, at Psicología-Online we help you find the answer.
Those people who avoid individual plans or believe that a movie or theater experience is more pleasant, simply because they are accompanied, often feel uncomfortable with the idea of improvising an afternoon of leisure and free time without having previously met a friend.
On the contrary, loneliness is an emotional treasure for those who do not experience loneliness from the perspective of emptiness or absence but rather of fullness. They are people who feel the creativity, enthusiasm, freedom and confidence of being with themselves.
Those people who live the positive experience of loneliness They appreciate your time and your ability to manage it autonomously without having to make agreements with anyone else. It is the freedom of being able to finalize the details of the agenda without having to reconcile that free time with that of another person.
People who enjoy their solitude have a intense inner world They are reflective people who maintain a constant internal dialogue with themselves. The human being is immersed in constant dynamics of relationships with others when being in society. For example, relationship with co-workers, coexistence with neighborhood residents and family.
Not all personal relationships are completely happy and satisfying. Many of them are perceived as a social protocol rather than an enjoyment. From this perspective, moments of loneliness become a pleasant disconnection that promotes emotional rest.
People who reach the state of enjoy periods of solitude They are those who have given themselves the opportunity to experience in practice experiences that break with those limiting beliefs that conclude that leisure plans lived in solitude are boring. For example, someone who, after having taken a trip alone, discovers that they have really enjoyed that experience is encouraged to set another similar goal. And, in this way, from the memory of this catalog of experiences, he builds a new map of the world.
In this other article we discover the positive points of loneliness.
5 reasons why you want to be alone
Each personal story is unique and unrepeatable, therefore, it has its own nuances. What are the reasons why a person always wants to be alone?
Moment of personal search Whoever finds themselves in a moment of change with respect to their usual lifestyle and wants to develop their introspection to find answers to the questions that beat inside them, then seeks solitude as a necessary refuge to think calmly. This situation is common in a moment of crisis when the protagonist wants to make important decisions.
Way to be There are people who, when they think of possible adjectives with which to define themselves to present themselves to others, explain that they are lonely. Does that mean they avoid personal relationships at all times? Lonely people also enjoy quality bonds. However, even when they are in a pair, they need a lot of space to themselves. They are creative people who do not get bored easily because they always have some project in mind to which they dedicate much of their free time.
Individualism. This is what happens when a pragmatic vision of time management arises, always focusing interest on oneself. In that case, the protagonist sees as an advantage being able to define their schedules at all times without having to adjust to the availability of another person’s agenda to make a plan. Sometimes, the person experiences the rebound effect of falling into individualism as a defense mechanism against a previous stage in which he has not respected his own space and has frequently adapted to the expectations of others.
Deep sadness The desire for solitude is not always the manifestation that the protagonist feels happy. Those who live through a period of sadness and apathy may tend to isolate themselves as a consequence of their own state of mind. In this case, that person’s friends and family become concerned when they observe how the protagonist distances himself from others and withdraws into himself. It is natural to want to spend more time alone in a sad situation, however, it is not emotionally healthy to always want to be alone.
Previous disappointments. When a person accumulates a sum of negative personal experiences in the area of love and friendship, they can reach the universal conclusion that loneliness is the best experience. Assuming a commitment to another person in relation to the care of that history requires conditions of reciprocity. In your moments of loneliness, you do not expose yourself to the pain of a friend not living up to your expectations, for example. Those who find themselves at a time when they want to avoid this type of friendly disappointment seek solitude as a protection mechanism.
Without a doubt, loneliness is a necessary experience. But moments of solitude are completed with spaces for social relationships.
This article is merely informative, at PsychologyFor we do not have the power to make a diagnosis or recommend a treatment. We invite you to go to a psychologist to treat your particular case.
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