Why Unhappy Couples Stay Together

According to data from ENSD (Statistics of Annulments, Separations and Divorces), divorces have decreased by 2.9% in Spain.

In 2018, 95,254 couples decided to end their marriage, 4,098 separated and 92 requested marriage annulment. The number of divorces fell by 2.9% compared to previous years, according to the National Institute of Statistics (INE). However, the truth is that of the couples who marry before the age of 50, almost 50% of them resort to divorce and more and more couples are getting engaged at a very young age.

Couples often get engaged without fully knowing the person with whom they share their life, either because have a child quickly how to get married without knowing each other too much After situations like these, they continue together even knowing that they are not in love or that perhaps they do not want the same thing. But why do we do this?

The main cause of unhappy couples who stay together usually lies when there is a child involved. Because it is sad to leave it and not see the child grow fully and they believe that they will negatively influence their child’s education, etc.

Cultural thinking

The truth is that many people stay together because of the economic situation or the resources they have together. Well salaries are still low to be able to rent or buying a home for a single person, and even more so if there is a child involved and it is necessary to provide a pension. There are many studies that show that social factors have great power in this way of life, because if our friends, family or the culture itself have taught us that it is normal to stay together despite everything, we do it without thinking about what we really want or it makes us happy. It is not until we meet a third person who can excite us that we make a drastic determination.

The fear

The fear of change, especially when you started the relationship at a very young age and years have passed and you would not know how to live without that person, is one of the greatest fears. Even so, the fear of change is general because it causes us anxiety about not knowing what will happen next or if we will be less unhappy than we thought. Thinking about leaving our partner makes us afraid, staying with them makes us dissatisfied. But what if you leave her and you’re no longer happy?

Acceptance

When a relationship is not working, both individuals usually realize that dissatisfaction. In many cases, the fear of this change causes it to not be recognized by any of the parties and the marriages remain together without absolutely anything happening due to fear. This can be very confused both for the couple themselves and for the children and friends around them.

Surely, you are all aware that it does not work, that the only thing left is fear and the attachment of so much time together. On many occasions, the frustration of finding what we really want can lead to frequent infidelities or to each individual doing their own thing regardless of the other and meeting at home as a common point. Is it necessary to continue doing this? Why don’t we accept that we are hurting ourselves?

Accepting what happens can change our reality, paving the way for new opportunities and experiences that we did not even imagine could appear to us and that we like. It may seem curious but when people leave their partner for another person who has also done so, the satisfaction in that relationship is much greater. Although in reality, the important thing is that accepting the situation reduces our fear and makes things easier for everyone.

For many people being alone For a while it is necessary to accept what happened and think about what we want and how we want to live. A very positive way to increase our personal growth and build new, satisfying healthy relationships. A transformative and free experience that will allow us to grow as people.