Zero Contact with Your Ex-partner, Does it Really Work?

PsychologyFor Editorial Team Reviewed by PsychologyFor Editorial Team Editorial Review Reviewed by PsychologyFor Team Editorial Review

Have you left your partner and don’t know how to forget them? Don’t you know what is the best method to leave behind memories of your ex? Discover how to use zero contact to forget him/her.

Does zero contact work to forget our exes?

When breaking up a relationship, many of us wonder what is the best way to forget about the person and move on. In many cases zero contact with your ex It is the most effective method of leaving behind all the love for that person. We tell you how to do it and if it really works.

What is zero contact?

How can you imagine zero contact with your ex It is precisely to cut off all channels of communication towards this person. In this way, contact between couples who have left should disappear completely at least during the first months.

He zero contact works if it is applied strictly and all the symptoms are relieved after leaving it with a person. Although leaving a relationship behind is a hard process to assimilate, the reality is that zero contact will be the best option to forget the love that still exists between the two.

Does zero contact work?

It is very possible that the first thing you ask yourself is whether it has been proven that zero contact in psychology works. The answer is it depends on the attitude and effort that exists behind the predisposition to use the zero contact with your ex

The reason why you should use the contact 0 with your ex is precisely because the majority of couples who get back together after a breakup usually don’t work out. Furthermore, you should use this method not as a reverse psychology strategy to get your ex back, but as a way to forget about that person and the damage that separation creates.

Benefits of zero contact

Use the zero contact with your ex girlfriend or ex boyfriend It gives you a series of benefits that will make this moment less bitter. In this way, total zero contact with the person you have broken up with will benefit you in the following.

  • It will give you time to heal: Keep the zero contact and not calling your ex works in many ways. Leaving the bond will allow you to move forward in yourself and you will be able to focus on other aspects than thoughts about the relationship you just lost. To make zero emotional contact effective, you can try to get out of your comfort zone and try new hobbies that you had not dared to start before.
  • You reflect on your life: He total zero contact It will allow you to observe the relationship you had with your ex-partner from another perspective. So much so that on many occasions you will be able to see what your failures were and how to remedy them to improve subsequent relationships and your own interior.
  • Helps regain control: Not calling your ex works since it allows you to set priorities in your life that will make you regain control of it. Sometimes the pain of losing someone makes us act in a way where we are actually hurting ourselves more than we imagine.

Benefits of using zero contact to forget your ex

  • Avoid excess negative thoughts: To control your mind and all the negative thoughts that will come to you due to the separation with your ex, zero contact It will allow you to make these much less. Many people try to get the person back, but the reality is that these types of attitudes will only make you end up feeling worse due to the excitement of getting back with them.
  • You will recover your self-esteem: Use the zero contact with your ex-partner It will allow you to rebuild the self-esteem that has been broken in your relationship. In many cases, after zero contact you will feel much better without the person around than with them. Or you can even allow yourself to resume a friendship with your ex since you don’t want anything from them.

Going through a breakup is a difficult process for anyone. Even so, perform the zero contact with your ex-girlfriend Maybe it’s impossible for you. In these cases you can always count on the help of a professional psychologist.

How to make zero contact?

It is possible that after leaving someone you want to be one of those couples who come back after a breakup. The reality is that ending a relationship means that it ultimately cannot work. Therefore, carry out the zero contact with your ex It will be a good decision. According to psychologists, you can achieve it through these tips.

  1. Admit the reality of the breakup: Sometimes the complicated thing when leaving a relationship is precisely eliminating from our brain that we will return to that person. We should not think about How long does it take for an ex to regret it? or how to get someone back into our daily lives. You must accept what has happened and a good way is to start zero contact with that person.
  2. Accept painful emotions: It is possible that when making zero contact you feel bad about the situation. The key to not going after your ex is precisely to accept these emotions. Cry as much as you need and talk as much as you need about your feelings with your friends and family. Repressing these emotions will only hurt you more. How to make zero contact?
  3. Eliminate good memories: Remembering the happy past with your partner will only create more pain for you. Although it is very likely that these thoughts come to your mind constantly, it is essential that you try to leave these memories behind and focus on the present or future. After the zero contact You will be able to recover these memories even though you will no longer see them with the same eyes.
  4. Delete your ex’s contact: To carry out the zero emotional contact You must ensure that you have no means of contacting your ex-partner. Therefore, it will be essential to try to eliminate everything that refers to the person. You can always leave the photographs with other people so you don’t have to erase all those memories.
  5. Stop blaming yourself: On many occasions when someone leaves us we try to visualize if we were to blame. Putting on these guilty feelings will only make you feel worse. It is for this reason that zero contact also has to be carried in your own thoughts. try replace each image with your ex-partner with a new challenge or goal that you propose in your future.How to make zero contact?
  6. Write down your feelings: Sometimes the best way to deal with our feelings after a breakup is precisely through words. This way you can write down how you feel and the process you should do to end those thoughts that are keeping you stuck in this situation. Write down what you think can help you let go of all actions or implications. synonyms of contacting your ex-partner
  7. Enjoy: Start by trying to do what you like in your daily life and try to enjoy your free time without a partner. Now is the best time to try new hobbies and get out of your most comfortable zone.

The key to coming out of a breakup stronger through zero contact It is precisely to distract the mind from thinking about our ex. Zero contact does not work if you do not get involved and try to advance your inner evolution. As you know, there are no rules to forget, but there are tips that will allow us to emerge stronger from a failed relationship.

Does zero contact with children work?

One of the few cases in which the ‘zero contact’ rule In the extreme it is when you have a child with your ex-partner. When a child is involved, zero contact should be done in moderation, that is, prioritizing the mental health and well-being of the children. That is, before betting on this rule, you must first try to become aware of what is under your control and what is not. In these cases, in order to use zero contact, we recommend the following:

  1. Give your ex partner time to release their emotions: It is normal that when faced with a breakup, both parties have certain misgivings about the other. Therefore, allowing him time to release these emotions is key to applying zero contact.
  2. Shows interest only in children: If you want to apply the zero contact with your ex-partner, the key is to try to show only interest in the child. That is, when you talk, focus only on the well-being of the children.
  3. Don’t show resentment: He zero contact It means stopping giving prominence in your life to your partner and the feelings you have towards this person. Resentment towards your ex-partner will only cause you to do more harm to yourself and your child, therefore, it is vital that you avoid this type of attitude.
  4. Focus on you and the child: Do your best to focus on your relationship with your children. Do not speak negatively about your ex-partner in front of the children, even if they explain something related to this person to you, try to make an effort to focus on yourself and your child.
  5. Remember not to force your ex to do what he or she doesn’t want to do: If your ex-partners don’t suit some plans, try not to bother about it and look at other options. The effective thing here is to think that the only thing you can control is your attitude and not what others do.

Although keep the zero contact rule with an ex-partner with whom you share children is more complicated, the reality is that it can be just as effective. The priority in these cases is to be clear that you must put the focus of your attention where it should be: on the relationship with your children.

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  • This article has been reviewed by our editorial team at PsychologyFor to ensure accuracy, clarity, and adherence to evidence-based research. The content is for educational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice. In case of a mental health crisis or emergency, call your local emergency services or contact a licensed professional immediately.