Metaperception: What It Is And How It Influences Us Psychologically
Currently more than 7.5 billion people live in the world. In Latin America there are more than 600 million people, while 47.3 million people live in Spain, 3.1 in Madrid; and in Barcelona, 1.6.
Over the course of our lives we will meet many people; a recent study determined the average at 5,000. One of our main concerns in our relationships is knowing what the other person thinks of us: he considers us nice, funny, or perhaps intelligent, or, on the contrary, he really dislikes us and hides it.
The term metaperception is used to refer to the beliefs and thoughts we have about how we are perceived by others. But how accurate is this perception that others have about ourselves? Do we think that the rest of the world sees us better or worse than it really does? In this article we will see what metaperception is its relationship with self-concept and its degree of certainty.
The way a person imagine the thoughts of others about yourself (that is, about that person who is imagining it) is called metaperception in psychology. Metaperceptions are based on a person’s personal beliefs and assumptions, and may be inaccurate. They have to do with our self-concept and prejudices: some people may believe that everyone likes them, when in reality this is not true. Others, however, believe that everyone hates them, and this is not an accurate assumption either.
We are psychologically programmed to need to be included in a social universe, and although many say they don’t care what others think, in reality we are creatures who want to fit in. In fact, social anxiety is an innate response to the possibility of being excluded from a group; Being rejected makes us very sad and uncomfortable.
To authentically connect with others and enjoy the deep satisfaction that comes from those connections, we have to be able to feel how people see us We can’t be within our own personal dissection of how people see us after they meet us, so we have to rely on the accuracy of our metaperceptions.
Studies have shown that people who have accurate meta-perceptions of themselves tend to be more successful in social interactions, as they are aware of how others perceive them and can use that awareness to guide your own behavior and improve your relationship with others
To navigate the social universe, you need to know what others think of us, although success will depend more on how we see ourselves and how accurate this vision is.
For example, if there is no good metaperception, a person may believe that everyone thinks their rude behavior is funny and cheeky, and they may continue to act that way or even emphasize these traits by thinking they are funny. This, in the long run, could make others reject you and even lead to social exclusion
Metaperception and self-concept
As we see, our self-concept is a great influence on the opinions we believe others have: We alter the information we receive from others based on what we believe about ourselves
The concept we have of ourselves is formed in our first years of life, mainly by our mother figure. According to different specialists, the way our mother interacts with us when we are babies has a great influence on our self-concept, how we expect others to see us.
In fact, children tend to behave in a way that is consistent with the way they have been treated. If a child has an emotionally unresponsive mother, he will generally be cold and distant. Children who, on the other hand, have mothers who are attentive and affectionate generally connect well with others and have a good opinion of themselves.
Self-esteem and self-concept play an important role in how people see themselves. People who have low self-esteem and low self-concept They may have difficulty believing that others see them positively since they rely on the opinions of others to form their own points of view.
People who are shy or have social anxiety often believe that they seem boring or unattractive, although many times others do not doubt their attractiveness, but they do consider them arrogant. In some way, for some specialists, shyness would be a trait of egocentrism; Shy people worry excessively about what others think of them and believe that everyone is watching them, which is rarely the case. This concern prevents them from being spontaneous.
Do we really know what others think of ourselves?
People believe that our internal states are evident to everyone; However, some experiments have shown that this is not true. In interventions with the target audience, it was observed that they were not aware of the nervousness that some speakers showed.
People expect others to share their vision of themselves immediately However, most people do not immediately know the value of other people’s attributes, nor do they have an accurate idea. There is a sort of average consensus about how someone imagines themselves. However, that knowledge cannot be applied to a particular person because there are many reasons outside of the view we have of ourselves that can influence how others see us.
Each person has their own personal way of evaluating other people, just as they have their own personal way of evaluating themselves. People see themselves in a positive way, they also see others in a generally good way
A study conducted by the University of Texas discovered that people who have a negative self-concept of themselves can negatively affect the way others see them: if in an interaction someone suspects that the person is constantly seeking their approval or wants to be liked too much, this can influence your opinion of the other.
Each person forms their opinions about others based on their own concept of themselves. to give coherence to your way of seeing the world and relationships, although this is not totally true and much less partial. For example, some people are “likers” and believe that everyone is smart and kind, but this is not true.
When we meet someone for the first time, we have to consider a lot and be attentive to many stimuli. We have to listen, plan what we are going to say and adjust our non-verbal behavior and we do all this almost without being aware of it. So it is difficult to interpret other people’s reactions correctly. We cannot guess what the other person’s judgments are during the encounter and we tend to make nominal interpretations of things. It is not until we later remember the original interaction that we can reflect on the metaperceptions and come to a conclusion.
Plus, there’s the context. Although, our personality is quite consistent in space and time, Some situations can change who we are or how we act, or even erase our personality. The place one occupies and the role one plays in a certain time and space can affect the way other people see us. You may be a happy and talkative person, but in your workplace you may not use those attributes due to different circumstances.
Why are there differences between how we see ourselves and how others do?
Some studies indicate that when we look at ourselves, we focus on specific details that we like, like a pimple we focus on certain parts of our body that we don’t like. However, when we look at others, we consider their overall appearance, not their flaws. Therefore, people are generally more attractive to other people than they think they are.
We could also say that our minds constantly use a processor that analyzes the physical world, based on the data our mind collects. It would be a social comparison processor, and psychologists call it the contrast effect (which can be interpreted as “we feel more beautiful with ugly people and uglier with beautiful people”). These comparisons happen constantly and automatically, and most of the time we are not even aware that we are making them. Our general self-concept is made up of thousands of these comparisons
Women in particular are affected by this phenomenon, since in today’s society unattainable models of beauty are established as standards. Women compare themselves to runway models to evaluate their physical attractiveness. However, this does not happen in the case of intelligence, people compare their intelligence with ordinary people, not with Einstein.
The contrast effect can affect other moments of daily life such as work. If we have to be more concerned about our physique, we are likely to perform worse when performing certain tasks.
Finally, the way others perceive us and our way of evaluating them can change If we want others to see us in a certain way, we have to let them know that we enjoy their company. Physical contact, smiling or showing interest in what you are talking about will make others feel that we care and enjoy their company and will also have a benefit in the perception we make of ourselves in others.
