Alexithymia: 9 Signs That Indicate An Inability To Express Feelings
Do you know that there are people with a lack of emotions and feelings? Do you think you may be an alexithymic? Discover what alexithymia is and the treatment for this disorder.
Most of the time we are aware of the role that emotion and feelings play in every decision we make. Ignorance of the emotions we experience can push us to take unfortunate steps or plunge us into a sea of doubts. The lack of emotions or people without feelings It is one of the most unknown conditions currently. So much so that it is very likely that you have not heard of alexithymia, a condition in which a person has a clear lack of feelings and emotions.
In psychology, it is called a person without feelings and with a clear lack of emotions, alexithymic The problem is not because alexithymia produces symptoms such as a lack of empathy, but rather this disease makes individuals who suffer from it feel both feelings and emotions but are unable to express them.
The alexithymic people They rarely get angry, they almost never cry, and when they do, they feel very disconcerted because they don’t understand what is happening to them or what the reason for their crying is. They are unable to articulate a single explanation for what they are feeling, and they are certainly not aware of their own feelings.
When something emotionally impacts, They feel so bewildered and have so little control over what is actually happening to them, that they avoid these types of situations at all costs. This may explain why many people say that they do not want to be given gifts: the fact of receiving them can move them and cause a storm in them that is ultimately experienced as something disconcerting and painful.
These people who seem totally insensitive, it is not that they lack feelings but that they are unaware of them and cannot express them. They can perceive the bodily changes that accompany emotions: tachycardia, sweating, accelerated breathing rate, etc., but they are unable to associate these reactions that their body experiences with emotions such as fear, anger, anger, etc.
Symptoms of alexithymia
The absence of feelings, the lack of empathy towards others and the inability to express emotions are the main evidence that denotes that a subject is alexithymic But there are more elements that define this disorder, namely:
Use of a gestural and verbal expression limited
Problems understanding and interpreting Abstract thinking
Absence of introspection and excessive attention to the outside
Constriction of aspects such as creativity, fantasy, symbolism and imagination
Greater tendency to loneliness, isolation and individuality
Problems to maintain emotional contact with the rest
Propensity to conformism regarding reality and the problems that surround us
difficulties for have social relationships outside of stereotypes
Tendency to manifest behaviors of dependence or submission as well as depressive attitudes
The problem with people with alexithymia is that in reality these individuals suffer from a certain emotional stagnation since they cannot express their feelings to others. Therefore, to others they seem like people with a clear lack of feelings and emotions even though reality is not like that. This type of pathology must be treated through a professional psychologist so that this condition does not lead to other mental problems.
Alexithymia test: Do I suffer from it?
To find out if you suffer from alexithymia, the only feasible way to find out is by going to a professional psychologist. Still, this self-assessment can help you discover if you’re experiencing certain problems. when expressing feelings and emotions:
Normally, I don’t know how I feel.
I usually don’t know what words to use to describe what I’m feeling and resort to simply saying statements like ‘I’m fine’ or ‘I don’t know’.
I have difficulty expressing how I feel about other people.
When I interact with others, I find it difficult to imagine how they might feel.
I find it easier to talk about situations or events than about feelings and emotions. I don’t understand the physical manifestations of my emotions.
If you have answered yes to most of the above statements and you also feel that these difficulties for express feelings and emotions are limiting you, it is important that you consult a professional psychologist. Keep in mind that the way alexithymia is expressed may vary from person to person.
How does alexithymia affect sexuality and relationships?
The social problems that underlie alexithymia are many and varied, since alexithymic They have difficulties feeling and transmitting emotions, which will condition their lives, especially what concerns relationships.
Little stability in your relationships: Subjects who suffer from it usually show a serious, reserved, apathetic attitude, lacking communication (both verbal and affectionate), isolated from others, which affects the complicity and camaraderie of a couple; This undoubtedly takes a toll on the stability of the relationship.
Social isolation: In the social sphere, the independent and isolated attitude they present is viewed with suspicion and distrust by others, who tend to leave them aside in meetings and meetings.
Rejection by others: Faced with events such as the death of a loved one or the birth of a child, alexithymics feel unable to recognize how they feel, what their emotions are; They show no pain, sorrow or joy. They don’t feel anything for anyone or anything. In this way, someone with alexithymia not only seems emotionally unavailable, but they are also perceived as people who have no feelings or emotions towards others. For this reason, many people end up rejecting them because lack of emotions in situations like those we have described.
When someone has a emotional disorder such as alexithymia It is very likely that he will end up isolating himself due to the discomfort that social environments produce. Constant rejection from others, who perceive them as people without feelings, can lead to disorders such as depression or anxiety. Therefore, it is vital to have a mental health professional when alexithymia is suspected.
Alexithymia and its causes
There are some causes that can cause people to feel this way. emotional helplessness and cannot express their feelings Among the most common reasons, we find the following:
Autism: autism may be one of the causes of alexitimi to. Despite this, research on the correlation between these two conditions is not entirely conclusive.
Depression: People with depression can suffer from this lack of feelings and emotions due to this disorder.
Trauma: People who experience a traumatic event are more likely to develop alexithymia. In fact, it is very likely that alexithymia be the result of the interruption of emotional development in youth.
Neurological diseases: There are possibilities that the inability to express feelings It may be due to a brain injury, a stroke, among others.
Treatment of alexithymia
Researchers have launched treatments that advocate interpersonal deepening. In this way, psychotherapy works to increase verbal communication, bodily expressiveness and emotional awareness of the alexithymic patients with the aim that they are capable of carrying out a social, family and couple relationship.
In addition to interpersonal and social therapies, experts often work with emotional intelligence through workshops. Some specialists choose to combine therapies with the use of psychoregulatory and antisomatizing drugs that allow emotions to be unblocked, favoring positive ones and inhibiting negative ones. Finally, researchers also recommend leading an orderly and completely structured life, so that they focus their attention on identifying their emotions and learning to communicate through them with the people around them.
At this point, it is necessary to request help from a specialist in psychiatry and psychology to be able to carry out a complete psychopathological examination and reach the point of conflict. These reactions are very typical in highly perfectionistic, obsessive people, with lack of impulse control, anorexia and bulimia, borderline personality disorders, states of anxiety and depression.
Although alexithymia and its symptoms must be treated by a mental health professional, there are a series of exercises or methods that can help you look into alexithymia an effective cure for people who suffer from it.
group therapy: The best method of leaving what is popularly called Dexter’s disorder, or alexithymia, is practicing emotional skills in social situations. In this way, group therapies can be very helpful so that these people can practice their emotional intelligence.
emotional diary: A good way to express what we feel is through the practice of writing. So much so that one of the ways to try to alleviate this emotional disorder It is keeping a diary with everything that has happened during the day and the feelings that have been felt in each of these situations. In this way, the emotional stagnation that can occur in an alexithymic person can be left behind.
Practice an art: Creativity and emotions are closely related. So much so, that any art can be a good way to train the expression of emotions. Through music, poetry or painting, a alexithymia person with severe symptoms it can alleviate many of the ravages of these pathologies.
Meditation and relaxation techniques: Meditation is the gold therapy for our current era. Through the practice of relaxation and meditation people can better understand their inner self. So much so that an affectation of secondary or primary alexithymia through the practice of these disciplines.
Read emotional books or stories: Reading is closely linked to the practice of empathy. In this way, the people without feelings or rather, individuals who with symptoms of lack of empathy can practice it through the imagination that books transmit.
The alexithymia It can be a condition that affects a person in many areas. Although an alexithymic may seem at first glance to be an emotionally unavailable individual, the reality is that they can train their empathy towards others.
