Aggression: 7 Tips To Leave An Aggressive Attitude Behind
Do you think you can be an aggressive person? Is your aggression affecting you and those around you? Discover what the causes of aggression are and how you can solve it.
On many occasions the aggressive people or who regularly use violence are not aware of their attitudes. So much so that even aggressive behavior becomes routine and normalized for their immediate environment. Although verbal aggression may arise in certain situations, when it becomes recurrent it can transform into something much worse. That is why the aggressive attitude must be corrected as soon as possible.
What is aggressiveness? Difference between violence and aggression
The aggressiveness It is a natural instinct that man carries with him from birth and that he shares with animals. This aggressive instinct helps us to be alert, defend ourselves and adapt to the environment. Therefore, aggressiveness is biological, instinctive and is regulated by neurochemical reactions. It is with culture that we have managed to modulate that aggressive instinct and all types of aggressiveness to turn it into a social instinct.
On the other hand, violence is not a natural behavior of human beings, but rather a cognitive and sociocultural product fueled by social roles, values, ideologies, symbols, etc. Violence is, therefore, a learned behavior with a great deal of premeditation and intentionality (aggression, on the other hand, is unconscious). Violence is the transformation of aggression to harm another human being. This violent way of acting does not exist in any other animal species, only in man. Violence generates social dysfunction, it is relational and utilitarian and we can find it in different areas, such as sexual abuse, family abuse, workplace bullying, school abuse, terrorism, war crimes, etc.
Precisely because it is a “human production” a world without violence is possible and, furthermore, we are on the right path. Increasingly we are able to condemn acts of violence that were once tolerated or not reproached, for example, gender violence. People have many tools to promote a non-violent world. They are tools that we can transmit and learn, practice and develop, in short, we can educate in non-violence. We can educate on the degree to which we express our emotions, on how to modulate them so as not to cause harm to others.
The key to leaving behind both a aggressive behavior as violence is education. Educate in respect for others, solidarity, cooperation (and not competition), equality, love for nature, conservation of the planet. This education has to be based on empathy since empathy is capable of deactivating violence practically automatically.
Types of aggression
The aggression or aggressive behaviors They can be presented in various ways. In this way, psychology experts have classified the aggressive attitude in the following way.
Instrumental aggression
A aggressive person He uses this violence to try to achieve an objective that benefits him. In these types of aggressiveness there is a clear intention to use the aggressive attitude. So much so that the person has previously meditated and planned the aggressive behavior to achieve his goal.
Impulsive aggression
When aggressive people are characterized by this type of aggressiveness, it is very likely that you have a very impulsive personality. This aggressive attitude is characterized because the person mainly experiences anger during the moment of tension.
Hostile aggression
These types of attacks are also premeditated. Typically, this is a verbal aggression with which an attempt is made to instill harm in the victim. The so-called reactive aggression, which is the result of a provocation, is also within one of these aggressive behaviors.
These types of attacks occur proportionally in both aggressive women as in aggressive men In situations in which these attitudes of an aggressive personality are recurrently detected, it is important to go to a mental health specialist to stop them.
Causes of aggressive behavior
The attitude of the aggressive people It can result from various conditions arising from mental health. In many cases these tend to be the main causes of aggression.
1. Stress
When a person suffers from an excessive level of stress, they may frequently use aggressive behavior to vent their frustration with their closest circle. In these situations it is vital to point out these types of aggression and try to detect the source that generates so much stress.
2. Alcohol or drug abuse
Addictions to substances such as alcohol or drugs can lead to behaviors typical of a aggressive behavior So much so that this aggressive attitude usually disappears when the dependence on these drugs is left behind. The so-called withdrawal syndrome may be the cause of this aggressive attitude.
Many times the aggressiveness It goes hand in hand with bipolar disorder. During the manic or depressive phase it is very possible that the person may tend to express an aggressive disorder combined with this illness.
4. Aggressive parents
When a child has been raised by parents who had a clear tendency to aggressiveness, it is very likely that people will end up repeating these patterns in their adulthood. Therefore, it is essential to try to correct these attitudes of aggressiveness and violence.
These are the main causes of people being aggressive. Despite this, this aggressive style It can occur despite not suffering from any of these situations due to the personality of each individual.
How to act when faced with an aggressive person?
Whether you are identifying these aggressive patterns in yourself, or you have someone around you who displays this aggressive attitude, here we will teach you some psychological methods with which you can stop these behaviors. Despite this, it is always advisable to go to a mental health specialist to find out the origin of these.
1. Recognize the behavior
The first step to eliminate the acts of a aggressive person It is precisely to nip these types of attitudes in the bud. To do this, you must identify when these types of reactions arise or point it out to the person who suffers them.
2. Understand or indicate the consequences of aggressiveness
To achieve motivation that allows us to change this aggressive attitude, it is vital to know why we do it. For this reason, recognizing all the consequences that may arise from aggressiveness will be a good method to encourage this change.
3. Don’t get frustrated or put pressure
change a aggressive personality it takes its time. You can’t expect aggression to disappear overnight. It is vital in these situations neither to put pressure nor to get frustrated for not seeing progress. Give yourself time for it.
4. Change your attitude towards anger
Normally, the aggressive people They have an attitude full of anger in the face of their frustrations or anger. To try to change this type of behavior, it is vital to see when we get angry and change these emotions that arise for more positive ones. This does not mean that we should eliminate them, but simply accept them and focus on other activities.
A way of remedy aggression It is expressing our thoughts at the moment that we feel a little anger. The problem with an aggressive personality is that people do not express what they feel in many situations to avoid conflict. It is vital to try to say what bothers us every time we feel bad.
6. Don’t avoid confrontation
Confrontations or arguments don’t have to be bad if they are treated calmly and openly. To do this, it is vital to try to maintain a passive attitude and not highlight everything negative or blame the other’s attitudes.
7. Practice meditation
Meditation is one of the most effective methods to both recognize and control our emotions. So much so that aggressive people can benefit from it in many ways. If you want someone around you to change their aggressive attitude, you can help them by encouraging them to practice meditation together.
These may be some affective indications to leave behind a aggressive attitude Even so, it is vital that the person who is verbally or physically aggressive wants to change and works with all his might in doing so.
Treatment of aggressive behavior
There are some psychological therapies that are focused on the treatment of aggressive attitude of a person Among the most well-known and effective we can find the following.
Couple therapy
When some of the types of aggression affect a couple’s relationship, a good way to approach the problem is through couples therapy. During the sessions, aggressive behaviors that may arise from poor communication on the part of the two lovers are addressed.
Cognitive behavioral therapy
One of the most effective treatments against aggressive people is precisely cognitive behavioral therapy. During the sessions, patients are taught to control and understand their aggressive behavior. In addition, coping mechanisms are established to try to better channel the thoughts and feelings associated with a situation. aggressive behavior
Psychodynamic therapy
An attempt is made to encourage people who resort to the aggressiveness to try to become aware of the feelings that are related to these aggressive behaviors. So much so that attempts are made to unravel the origin and causes of aggression in a person.
All these treatments are focused through a session with a professional psychologist. Thanks to them, an aggressive person will be able to learn from himself not only to control this type of aggressive behaviors, but to know why these bad habits arise. This way, you will learn more about yourself and help yourself become the person you want to be.
