Psychological Keys To Get Out Of A Toxic Friendship Relationship
There is a lot of talk about toxic relationships in the couple’s sphere, and with good reason: for decades a series of expectations, preconceived ideas and roles have been reproduced that made it very difficult to experience love as a couple in a free and healthy way from a point of view. from a psychological point of view.
However, we must not overlook that there are also other forms of relationships based on an emotional bond that can be twisted relatively easily and “trap us” in them. This is what sometimes happens with certain friendships that become harmful without us realizing it at first.
Therefore, in this article We will talk about how to get out of a toxic friendship relationship taking into account the mechanisms that may be working in it to prevent us from taking that step.
It is very difficult to get out of a toxic friendship relationship if we do not know how to recognize it as such and detect the behavioral dynamics that keep us anchored to it. Which is not simple
In fact, one of the most problematic aspects of toxic friendships is that They can take very different forms in part because the concept of friendship is not subject to as many stereotypes and expectations as couple relationships, and in a certain sense that makes the people involved keep their “guard down” without questioning what they see happening in these interactions, while not having so many references to compare with.
So, some key ideas that can help you identify a toxic friendship relationship These are what you will see here, and which are frequently met in this type of dysfunctional relationships:
How to get out of a toxic friendship?
When it comes to letting go of these harmful friendships that do not bring you anything, keep these guidelines in mind.
1. Analyze what has kept you in it
If you have been involved in that friendship for a while now even though it brings you suffering, It’s worth asking yourself why In this way, it is recommended that you make a brief list of the elements that have been holding you back, such as: the feeling of guilt, the fear of making a fool of yourself by expressing that you want to cut off contact, the doubts about “what will say “my family”, etc.
Once written down, order them according to the intensity with which they affect you, select the first two or three, and propose a deadline to prepare a total or partial solution to partially “neutralize” their effect. This will make you gain confidence in yourself and make you take the step.
2. Be aware if someone else in your friendship circle limits you
It is possible that this toxic friendship has been affecting you not because of the influence of a single person, but because of the joint effect of several people in that circle of friendship that make you feel vulnerable If so, think about who is your main link with that group, the person with whom you have the main toxic friendship, and focus your efforts on ending that link with them, without attempting to address the entire group at once.
You should not write a very long speech to memorize, quite the opposite; If you do, you will feel very vulnerable. Instead, think of one or at most two reasons why you will communicate that you are ending the relationship, which can be expressed simply and briefly.
4. If you feel anxious, practice visualization
Think about the time and place in which you will communicate that you are officially out of that friendship relationship, Close your eyes and imagine that experience vividly This will help you lose your fear of him.
Related article: “What is anxiety: how to recognize it and what to do”
5. Give yourself a deadline
It is important that you take action and make explicit your intention not to continue investing your time and efforts in that dysfunctional friendship, to avoid misunderstandings and not expose yourself to situations in which you give in and decide to continue pretending that nothing is happening. If you notice that your integrity or dignity is at risk, consider communicating it online or telematically, keeping in mind that the other person may not deserve a face-to-face conversation Your physical and mental health comes first.
Related article: “Time management: 13 tips to take advantage of the hours of the day”
Do you want to have professional psychological support?
If you are looking for psychological assistance services, I invite you to contact me.
My name is Thomas Saint Cecilia and I am a psychologist who is an expert in cognitive-behavioral psychology; I work helping adults, adolescents, couples and companies, and the sessions are held in person in Madrid or online.
