Shyness is a state of mind characterized by fear of what others think of oneself For this reason, it usually goes hand in hand with a predisposition to totally or partially avoid certain social interactions with people whom one does not know or know little, and the idea of looking ridiculous or generating rejection causes discomfort even before those you find occur.
Thus, shy people, those who generally show a high level of shyness, They live their social lives based on pessimistic predictions about the impression they will make on their interlocutors or, in certain cases, even to those people who look at them without starting a conversation.
Shyness becomes a trait with such capacity to express itself in many situations that it is also considered a personality trait. However, as we will see, it can be modified through learning and experience.
Shyness is not in itself a trait that is always disadvantageous Although it is true that in most countries of Western culture the fact of being a shy person tends to be seen as a defect, in reality this assessment is very arbitrary and subjective. For example, in certain Asian countries it is seen as a virtue, and in certain situations it is even useful.
However, as with so many other traits in Psychology, everything depends on the degrees or levels of intensity. Extreme shyness is, in most cases, a source of problems. And although It is possible to “tame” it over time and learn to overcome it this is complicated without professional psychological assistance.
In the professional and work context, some of the most frequent problems due to excessive shyness are the following:
All these are some of the problems that usually affect very shy people. without the need for them to have developed psychopathology But if your shyness reaches the point of being considered symptomatology of social phobia, there are even more problems to deal with; Those who suffer from this type of disorder even go so far as to be absent from work or not carry out part of their tasks to avoid certain social interactions.
4 tips to overcome shyness in the professional context
Apply these recommendations to your daily life at work to learn how to overcome your shyness in the work context.
1. Estimate the daily time you spend on informal interactions
For a week or two, roughly quantify the time you spend in informal conversations on breaks and leisure events with coworkers. This will help you establish a “baseline” of what you are used to. Your goal is to tolerate a significant increase in this average number of daily minutes well being able to expose yourself to it without feeling bad.
To avoid a “defensive” attitude in your more or less informal conversations with your work colleagues, it is good that you prepare yourself with the idea of not adopting a passive role in dialogues. Make others also think about making a good impression on you: express your opinions assertively, ask questions to get to know your interlocutor better, etc. Definitely, put the ball in their court
3. Look at the mistakes that others make when talking to other co-workers
Becoming aware of these small imperfections and realizing that no one pays much attention to them will help you assume that they are normal, so that you lose your fear and stop trying to avoid falling into them at all costs.
4. Write down the important information that must be communicated and consider transmitting it on that day
Setting these very clear time limits will help you avoid the temptation of leaving “for another day.” those somewhat awkward moments when you have to deliver bad news
Are you looking for psychological assistance?
If you are thinking about overcoming your shyness problem by going to a psychologist, I invite you to contact me. I am a psychologist who is an expert in the cognitive-behavioral model, very effective when it comes to adopting new habits and alternative ways of relating to others, and I serve adults and adolescents. You can count on my services both in my office located in Madrid and through online sessions by video call.
