How To Mediate A Conflict Between Friends: 10 Useful Tips
Friendly relationships are not always on good terms; It is common that at times there are moments of tension between friends. Sometimes it may happen that some of our friends fight and we have to mediate so that the situation does not go too far.
In this article we are going to see how to mediate a conflict between friends, preventing the bond of friendship from deteriorating to the point that it affects the other members of the group. We will learn to recognize our emotions and those of others, to be able to manage them properly and provide common sense.
In the following lines you will find some effective and recommended ways to know how to mediate a conflict between close friends.
1. Identify the problem
The main thing we must do to resolve conflicts between our friends is be clear about the real reason for your disagreement ; Once we know, we can begin to look for the best ways to help resolve the conflict between those involved.
We must be careful with information from third parties. The best thing is to talk to your friends and get to understand the points of view of each of them, so that your perspective is as objective and reliable as possible. When you have talked to your friends about the situation, you can draw your own conclusions from the matter.
2. Make them understand that there are ways to solve conflicts
You have to give your friends the necessary tools so that they can face their situation in a more appropriate way.
Some people have in mind that the only way to confront differences is through aggression and violence; They are subjects with little tolerance for frustration. Talking to each of them individually, You must explain what are the other ways to resolve an existing conflict For example, assertive communication, respect for other people’s opinions, acceptance between people despite the differences they may have, etc.
3. Invite them to tell you how they feel about it
Ask your friends how they feel about the situation. This way you will give them the opportunity to reflect on the behavior they are having, and They will be more likely to realize their mistakes and want to correct them They will probably ask you for advice on how to resolve the situation with the other people involved.
4. Avoid taking sides
It is important that you always remain impartial during your purpose of reconciling the parties involved in the conflict. Otherwise, instead of calming things down between your friends, you could escalate the personal dispute even more. The best thing to do is to show them that you can accept both of their points of view without taking sides.
The example you can give them regarding how you approach the situation, and how you are able to remain impartial between them, turns out to be ua fundamental contribution to make them overcome their differences and become good friends again Many times people learn more by example than by words.
Something that is totally contrary to the intention we have of making our friends reconcile in a good way is trying to do this process in a hasty and forced way. What is advisable is understand that perhaps your friends need a reasonable amount of time to reflect about what could have happened.
Don’t try to get them together without their consent to talk, this can end up in an awkward situation for everyone, and then it will be even more difficult for your friends to want to see each other again. Remember that nothing that is forced brings good results.
6. Ask them how they would resolve the conflict
Through this question you are giving your friends the chance to accept that they want to fix things with other people, and a planning process will begin in your mind aimed at resolving the conflict that may exist between them.
It is important that you give them adequate ideas so that they act in the best possible way.
7. Make them see the good in other people
It is common that during fights people only focus on the negative aspects of the other and even magnify them.
Your role as a conflict mediator friend will be to recognize and reduce the biases that exist between the parties involved, so that they can remember the positive things about each of them.
8. Suggest meeting to clarify things
Forcing a situation is not the same as making a suggestion; We must take this into account to avoid misunderstandings. What we should look for is that our friends are willing to meet in person to talk about their conflict and why it has arisen. Thus, each person will have room for maneuver to establish their preferences and make their decisions. Without freedom, reconciliation is not possible, only the appearance of normality can be given.
Even though you want your friends to reconcile, you should also keep in mind that They may have their personal reasons for deciding to distance themselves from some people We cannot pretend that just because we are still friends with someone, our other friends have to be friends too, nor should we ridicule their decisions.
10. Respect final decisions
In the event that we have unsuccessfully tried everything in our power to get our friends to overcome their differences and resume their friendship, we must accept their personal decisions and avoid taking a pushy stance about changing their mind Each person is the owner of their decisions, and we must not forget that no one is obliged to continue investing efforts in a relationship, whether it is friendship, love or business. Although any conflict can technically come to an end, that doesn’t mean that striving for ultimate reconciliation is the best way to spend your time.
