The family environment is fundamentally based on the way in which family members relate to each other. That is why communicating well or poorly within this group can make the difference between creating solid and functional emotional bonds, or constantly experiencing disputes, fights and loneliness.
In this article we will see several guidelines to know how to communicate better with our family Keep in mind, however, that you are going to have to implement these steps in your daily life; Doing it a few times is no use.
No matter how much family members spend time together, that doesn’t mean they manage communication with each other appropriately. In fact, In some cases communication problems become entrenched and the passage of time only aggravates them due to the inertia they bring.
In the event that you no longer spend much time with your family, it is very possible that the main communication problem with your family has to do with isolation, that is, the fact of practically never interacting with those people, or doing so. very little and through digital media.
Whether you live in the same home as the rest of the family or not, the passage of time does not have to fix anything. That is why it is important to take charge of the situation and take care of the way in which we communicate with fathers, mothers, grandparents, uncles, brothers… Create a point and separate and promote a change for the better can make both coexistence and the expression of affection benefit from it almost instantly.
Follow these tips to qualitatively change the way relationships develop between family members.
1. Don’t take anything for granted
The fact that we have spent a lot of time with our families can create the illusion that we know what each of its members thinks. Therefore, sometimes the communication blockage that exists between two people of the same blood is due to a misunderstanding.
The idea that we know a person so much that we don’t even need to investigate how they feel It can do a lot of damage to close relationships Humans are complex beings, and that is why our behavior is not always predictable.
2. Break the routine with a conciliatory gesture
A small symbolic detail can make the brother, uncle or grandfather with whom we want to improve communication realize that something has changed and stop assuming that the interaction with us will be governed by the same rules of communication. always.
For example, giving a pat on the back or offering something to drink, depending on what the relationship was like before, can be something novel, no matter how insignificant it may seem. Given these acts, it is easier to start from scratch and facilitate the possibility of establishing more fluid and honest communication The following guideline to follow is precisely about the latter.
3. Make honesty your “guiding” value
From the moment you decide to improve communication with your family, it is important to make it clear that honesty becomes a priority in your interactions with these people who have seen you grow up. The reason is simple: otherwise, the value given to these communication initiatives will be very low, since The family context is one in which greater sincerity and openness are expected To better connect with family members, it is necessary not to try to hide our vulnerabilities at all costs.
Not being completely transparent at work or with people you have just met is not frowned upon, but the family, by definition, is the place where the personal is shared almost everything about oneself.
4. Put effort into listening
Active listening is a fundamental element in any communicative process, and those that are carried out within the family are no exception to this rule. Sometimes, we tend to fall into the trap that by the simple fact that the listener theoretically does not need to speak or move, he can completely disconnect from his surroundings and direct his attention towards anything.
This can become a habit that kills any attempt to communicate, because dialogues in which only one person takes his or her part does not please anyone and serves as a “punishment” for having tried to start a conversation.
So that, When the other person speaks, be silent and do not interrupt, but give signs that you follow the thread of what is being said and that you are interested, ready to contribute something extra when it is your turn to speak. Looking into each other’s eyes is essential (if you find it difficult, simply try not to look away from the other’s face, or lower your gaze, and eye contact will be established spontaneously), as is nodding from time to time, making brief comments on the go, etc.
5. Show that you don’t judge
Family members know each other much more intimately than other people know each other. Therefore, it is good to remember that those imperfections of others that we recognize They are a reflection of the human character of a family member and something that is usually hidden in other people.
Therefore, it is advisable not to make unfair comparisons: if a brother, mother or cousin appears imperfect it is because we have more opportunities to know them than the rest, not because they are necessarily worse.
