This article includes reflections on how telephone abuse and internet browsing can affect contemporary couples.
We are living in a time in which we have the electronic tools that past generations dreamed of, and they have now become part of our daily lives. Many of these new electronic tools and gadgets are supposed to make communication easy: Email, text messaging, and cell phones are made so that we can be in constant contact with anyone we want; sounds like what it really should improve our communication
However, it seems that electronics are causing problems for many couples and instead of helping communication it has become a barrier. Instead of allowing them to spend more time together, it is taking away quality time together for many couples. Instead of making work easier, it seems to encourage many people to take their work home with them… Having access to the latest technology is not a bad thing and it doesn’t have to be bad for your marriage either. It is important, however, to set some boundaries with your spouse and take some proactive steps in this regard.
If your husband tries to tell you something while you are watching television, are you guilty of not paying attention ? The answer is relative…If you are using the computer you sometimes respond with “yes” without having a clue what your spouse just said.
Do you text during dinner, or while you’re celebrating a date together? These are just a few examples of the ways technology can interfere with time in the couple’s relationship It’s important to put it aside at certain times and find times to be together, making sure you can actually be present with your partner and not checking your email or responding to text messages.
2. Set limits on electronics use
Talk to your partner about what is a reasonable amount of time to use electronic devices each day. Maybe two hours of television and computer time may be a good limit, or maybe you think 30 minutes a day is enough. Each couple will have a different limit depending on your schedules and responsibilities.
Then, without making any changes, spend a week recording the amount of time you spend using your cell phone, your computer, playing video games, or watching television. Write it down every day because this can be eye-opening for many people. Most people underestimate the amount of time they actually spend “hooked” on technological devices and they are surprised to see how many hours they actually spend using them.
Once they are aware of the amount of time who occupy this activity, develop a plan to reduce their use if necessary. Replace the time you normally spend watching TV with talking to your partner. Instead of communicating through text messages or social media, spend time together. Plan a date night, go out together, do activities together to rebuild your relationship.
You can agree to leave your mobile phone at home when you go to work. celebrate a special date If the thought of this invokes feelings of panic in you remember that not long ago, people didn’t have cell phones and they survived just fine. If you can’t stand the thought of not having it, at least agree to keep it quiet and avoid constantly checking to see if you’ve received anything. The point is to give your spouse attention.
Giving up electronics, even just television for a short period of time, will help you reconnect with your partner. This can help them rediscover other things they like to do and can mark a big difference in their relationship
Try with very basic techniques : Turn off the television during dinner, the computer an hour before going to bed, etc. These types of rules can ensure that they are interacting more with each other than with electronics. Meditate on it. In these times, technology related to information from use and not abuse is positive, but beyond certain limits it can affect and deteriorate your relationship.
